Therapy for addiction

Alcohol holds a strangely privileged place in our culture.

It’s widely accepted, even encouraged, to drink as a way to relax, socialise or ‘have fun’. The idea of getting drunk can often be normalised as a harmless escape. Because of that cultural backdrop, lots of us don’t notice when drinking shifts from something light-hearted into something that quietly affects our emotional connection at home, with those who are closest to us.

When alcohol becomes a way of easing stress or numbing painful feelings, the relational impact can be significant. Emotional presence often fades: someone may be physically in the room but harder or impossible to reach, they may become reactive, inconsistent, or unpredictable for instance. What starts subtly can develop into heightened volatility - anger, defensiveness, impulsive reactions, yelling, and partners can find themselves struggling to cope with behaviours that are actually unacceptable, hurtful or destabilising and which aren’t characteristic of the person.

Over time, boundaries and emotional connection that once felt clear and joyful can begin to erode, and the non-drinking partner may start accommodating or making sense of behaviour that is actually very destructive to the relationship. Not because they agree with it, but because they are trying to preserve the relationship or avoid conflict.

In therapy, my focus is on understanding what the drinking is doing for us when we drink, take drugs or use other behaviours compulsively. We look at the feelings we are anaesthetising, the fears it dampens, while also noticing and addressing the emotional and relational cost.

Awareness brings clarity, and clarity helps people see how they can make choices that protect their wellbeing, their boundaries and their sense of safety, enhancing their mental and physical wellbeing and preserving the relationships they value most.